I can tell you really want to do well by your kid, but you're having a rough time. Sorry to hear that. I'm going to ignore the threats of physical violence, which I think you understand would only make things worse, and just point out a couple of things:

>...punishments that seem to be showing no signs of improvement in her behavior.

You should stop punishing her. If it's not working, it's not working. Find something other way to modify her behaviour, which is a topic way to big for a comment in reddit. You could start by taking online parenting courses. I've gone through bits of the Yale courses on Coursera and they helped a lot.

https://www.coursera.org/learn/everyday-parenting

>...she's had to throw away her coloring books, art supplies, etc., because she can't quit coloring on things she's not supposed to...

Think about this a second. She was coloring things she wasn't supposed to color, and your response included throwing away the things she was allowed to color in the first place. Can you see how a child of 7 might get super-confused by that punishment? It doesn't even provide a path forward for better behaviour.

I've found half of parenting is just putting myself in my kid's shoes and saying, "What would make sense to me? What would get me to act differently." If the kid colors on the walls, is it because she likes to color? Then I'd buy more supplies, not less, and just affirm over-and-over that coloring is for those.

If it rather seems intentional, to provoke you, I'd stop rewarding her behaviour with any reaction. Just an emotionless "we don't color on this wall" then ask for help cleaning up.

Instead, she behaved a certain way and got a big, dramatic confrontation with her parents. In her mind, this is better than nothing. Shoot, it demonstrates you care! You might as well have told her coloring on the walls is a great idea.

IDK, I don't think you're too far off, mostly because you recognize that there are issues. I really think some parenting courses with a few strategies could help you over the hump.

Parenting course that you can audit for free

Free Yale Course on Parenting

I was browsing the internet for parenting resources (outside of reddit of course), and I ran across a free Yale course on parenting through Coursera. I made sure their wasn't a paywall, and it seems to be really free. Professor, Dr. Alan Kazdin teaches the course, here's a blurb from his wikipedia:

"Alan Edward Kazdin is a research professor of Psychology and Child Psychiatry at Yale University. He is a Sterling Professor emeritus and was the director of the Yale Parenting Center and Child Conduct Clinic. Kazdin's research has focused primarily on the treatment of aggressive and antisocial behavior in children. "

And here's the link:

Coursera Link

Hope someone finds this useful!

For pregnancy: What to expect when you're expecting is helpful and the week by week guide at babycentre (https://www.babycenter.ca/pregnancy) is fun to follow along to.
For parenting: Coursera's Yale course (free to audit) on parenting (https://www.coursera.org/learn/everyday-parenting), The Wonder Weeks is an unnecessary but sanity-saving book, The Happiest Baby on the Block is great for teaching swaddling and how to soothe an infant, and I'm sure there are so many others.
The most important practical thing you can do, honestly, is make sure your partner has water. For most of my wife's pregnancy and all throughout breastfeeding, my main duty was to make sure her pitcher of water was full. It's thirsty work being a mom, like you wouldn't believe.

Free Yale Online course for Parents of Toddlers through Adolescents

Just a quick reply that I hope might help: attend the ABC parenting course on Coursera! It has totally changed our life with a high need, strong willed energetic 4 year old!! https://www.coursera.org/learn/everyday-parenting

It is still a lot of work all day long but after one week of using the tools only from the first section we have a much happier and more easy going child.

Don't forget to take care of yourselves as well before you are totally run down. Your child needs happy, well rested parents. Any change (for example stopping breastfeeding) might be hard for 2-3 days but kids adapt and forget so quickly.

Good luck with everything.

I think this is really going to vary from aspie to aspie. My wife and I have a 14-month-old boy and he is my life's most important project. I spend a lot of time each day researching parenting best-practices (tell him to audit the Coursera Yale course: https://www.coursera.org/learn/everyday-parenting/home/info) so I know what's expected of me and I do my very best every day. I feel like I'm a normal, loving, slightly neurotic father to my boy.

I think this one is fairly well-recommended around here.
https://www.amazon.ca/How-Talk-Kids-Will-Listen/dp/1451663889 And Yale has a parenting course that deals with this as well (and it is free to audit: you can take the course but you can't take the test at the end and get a certificate): https://www.coursera.org/learn/everyday-parenting

Yes it is. Here is a link https://www.coursera.org/learn/everyday-parenting

>then as consequences (no dessert that night/being put in time out/spanking/ being grounded

Using food, especially sweets, as a punishment or reward is something that fosters an unhealthy relationship with food and eating.

Spanking is not effective beyond the immediate moment and has serious long term negative side effects (resentment, aggression, lack of self esteem among others) and the consensus among scientists and doctors is that it is never recommended.

>that makeup incident earned her a week long grounding

Longer/harsher punishments are no more effective than short punishments; they simply amplify the negative effects of punishment without any benefit. (Those are resentment, lying and avoidance, breakdown of the relationship, self esteem issues, etc.) That is to say, a punishment that is a week long is no more effective than a punishment that is a day long (or in a 4 year old's case, half an hour long), but it will amplify all the problem behaviors you're now complaining about.

Punishment also does not teach or encourage a kid to do what you want; it's entire focus is on what you don't want.

Punishment is simply not very effective and evidence-based behaviorist models suggest keeping punishment to a minimum and focusing strongly on positive reinforcement of the behaviors you do want. Getting angry and then instituting harsher punishments is just going to put you in a vicious back-and-forth cycle with your daughter while getting you nowhere.

All this to say, do what u/faceinabush suggested and find an empirically-supported parenting program like the one they recommended at Coursera.

Check out this free online course:

https://www.coursera.org/learn/everyday-parenting

Free Yale 4 week ABC parenting class I’m starting that I’ve heard helps with ODD, sharing in case others may be interested...

Free 4 week course provided by Yale

Everyday Parenting: The ABCs of Child Rearing

This parenting course from Yale is free, and it’s really highly recommended around here!

https://www.coursera.org/learn/everyday-parenting

The above is a free course from Yale University. It’s all online and provides a lot of valuable information regarding child rearing techniques and how to help/create new habits. Even if you don’t get through the entire course I think there is a lot of good info that everyone can apply to their life with toddlers and kids.

Here are some techniques you can use, and they work. Wayching these short videos was the best time investment of my (parenting) life: https://www.coursera.org/learn/everyday-parenting/home/welcome

I 100% recomend this, it is exactly about the problems you describe and it works!

https://www.coursera.org/learn/everyday-parenting/home/welcome

Good luck with that. My wife can't say no to our son and doesn't want to 'hurt him'. I have a system of consequences (for example, throw a toy that's not a ball, toys are not for throwing, toy goes on timeout). It's not perfect, but I try to keep it consistent and I usually do what I say.

When I am alone with our son, we have great peace. Consequences rarely have to occur. Sometimes he tests his boundaries. Personally I feel this is 'hurting him' less but YMMV.

When we share responsibilities, it's a real nightmare. My wife announces consequences that never occur, repeats requests endlessly, and does stuff for him he knows bloody to do himself. She tries to placate when he throws tantrums. Then he feels unfairly punished when I say throw the toy again and it goes timeout, he does and it does. Then there are big tears ... daddy took my toy away ... FML

See if he is willing to do the Everyday Parenting course. It may be easier when the advice comes from an expert that's not you.

If you want some reading material https://www.coursera.org/learn/everyday-parenting and the book How to Talk So Kids Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk

The article recommends the book Kazdin Method. He has a free to audit video course:

https://www.coursera.org/learn/everyday-parenting

> Yale ABCs of Child Rearing

https://www.coursera.org/learn/everyday-parenting

I'd recommend The Kazdin Method for Parenting the Defiant Child by Alan Kazdin. It's considered by many to be the gold standard in science-based programs for improving children's behavior. If you prefer video lectures, he has a free course called Everyday Parenting: The ABCs of Child Rearing that isn't specific to "defiant children" but incorporates the same principles and research.

Look up Yale’s course “the abcs of child rearing”

https://www.coursera.org/learn/everyday-parenting

The book “how to talk so little kids listen “ is also a great resource.

Positive reinforcement and making everything into a game seem to be the most effective method with kids.

Not a book but found it very useful:

https://www.coursera.org/learn/everyday-parenting

Here is a link to it:

https://www.coursera.org/learn/everyday-parenting

I'm going to second the "don't" crowd. It's really challenging even in ideal situations. Just realize, she can drop you out of this kids life for no cause at all. There are a few threads about that here. But if you do it, I suggest you study up:

https://www.coursera.org/learn/everyday-parenting

I recommend this course: https://www.coursera.org/learn/everyday-parenting

https://www.coursera.org/learn/everyday-parenting

Take a look: https://www.coursera.org/learn/everyday-parenting/ . It's an amazing free course by a Yale psychologist specializing on solving behavioral issues.

Another resource is this free online course:

https://www.coursera.org/learn/everyday-parenting

The methods from this course pan out as particularly effective. The idea is that yelling is caused by frustration and that increased effectiveness reduces frustration.

Two strikes against him so far, just in a single day: (1) he smacked your child, (2) when you called him out on it, instead of apologizing he gave you the silent treatment.

This man has no clue how to manage his own anger.

He needs to learn. Could you look for anger management classes in your area? Parenting classes in your area or online (for instance: https://www.coursera.org/learn/everyday-parenting)? Couples counseling? He needs to start doing the work to change, or else it would be better for you guys to be away from him.

The first point in the article is literally absurd:

>Do remember that picky eating is often “developmentally normal.”

It's either developmentally normal or it isn't. Development milestones apply to the whole population or they don't.

This article points out that many or all picky eaters reject familiar foods that they previously ate:

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-art-science-teaching-kids-eat-right/201411/can-we-please-stop-saying-picky-eating-is-normal

So, picky eating cannot be explained by children rejecting novel foods for any reason, developmental or otherwise.

Alan Kazdin, former president of the APA and head of the Yale Parenting Center has found that Parent Management Training (PMT) is quite effective to prevent picky eating. He has a free online course that teaches the method which is validated by numerous randomized controlled trials and is considered effective in a Cochrane review:

https://www.coursera.org/learn/everyday-parenting

>Most picky eating cannot be explained by poor parenting. The proof for that is that many picky eaters have siblings who eat just fine

This is based on the fallacy of treating parenting as either good or poor, black or white. Parenting is a continuum of skill levels. Many parents just don't have the skills to prevent all picking eating.

Also, the fact that many kids don't evidence picky eating puts the lie to the notion that it a developmental phase.

The rest of the article is good. But it starts out with dubious claims that logically undermine a parent's will to improve their skills.

>Read '1-2-3 Magic'. Told us to essentially use the 3 strikes rule when giving direction. This is something I do consistently and S.O. struggles with (I have 5 other kids from my previous marriage and this method worked great with them). SS frequently explodes to this approach (which doesn't stop me, but I'm not sure how effective a strategy it is)

I think the idea is to ignore harmless explosions.

But there is another similar approach called Parent Management Training (PMT).

This free-to-audit course covers the method:

https://www.coursera.org/learn/everyday-parenting

And some other versions are covered in the Further Reading section here:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Parent_management_training

PMT might be called "1 Magic". You don't count, can use zero threats and warnings. First, you make a rule about what leads to timeout or punishment. You tell the kid the rule only once. You just impose the rule for each infraction and ignore all the kid's counter-measures (harmless explosions for instance).

I think PMT permits one or two warnings in some circumstances assuming that you follow through 100% of the time, but it does not require wantings.

It's quite common for kid's to engage in attention-seeking behavior. The trick is a judo move, where you turn this to your advantage. Typically all you need to do is get control of your own attention. Think of your attention as your behavior-getting attention. You need to redirect your behavior-getting attention in the direction of the behaviors that you want and away from the behaviors that your don't want.

The only problem is that you have to do this consistently for a while before you will see a big improvement. It takes a while for the kid to internalize the fact that your behavior has permanently changed. And, if you have been inconsistent, then it takes even longer. When you first start ignoring unwanted behaviors, then the first thing that happens is the "extinction burst" where the kids behavior gets worse and more varied. The extinction burst usually last for a day or two, but you can inadvertently train a longer one by giving in to it.

Anyway, you can learn the ropes by auditing this course for free:

https://www.coursera.org/learn/everyday-parenting

It's taught by the head of the Yale Parenting Center and Child Conduct Clinic.

For harmless annoying behaviors, use "planned ignoring" (google it) and direct your attention to a positive opposite or replacement behavior when it occurs. The course will teach you actions to take for behaviors that cannot be ignored.

I often hear this free online class from yale recommended for this kind of thing - https://www.coursera.org/learn/everyday-parenting

I think one of the key things is to ignore the behaviour you want to discourage and strongly encourage the behaviour you want. So when the tantrum starts just calmly remove yourself from the situation and when she is behaving well point out what you like. Easier said than done, eh!

Reinforce praise to your kids with touch

I signed up for this free course:

https://www.coursera.org/learn/everyday-parenting/

I've gone through a few of the lessons and mostly pretty standard stuff though some interesting tidbits. One change I've already started doing is they suggest when you are praising your kids for good behavior you reinforce it by some kind of affectionate touch. Hi-Five, hug, literal pat on the back, etc.

Especially for young kids, this really makes a difference. I've been doing this for about 2 weeks and it seems to be making a difference. Less whining and complaining and getting them ready for school this morning was kind of a breeze. I was already praising them by specifically mentioning what they were doing right but the addition of giving them physical affection seems to be helping.

Randomized controlled trials of parenting methods

There is a Cochrane review that shows that methods taught in Parent Management Training (PMT) are effective at reducing conduct problems:

https://epubs.rcsi.ie/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=1065&context=gpart

Cochrane reviews are very strict about the quality of the evidence. They require evidence from good quality randomized controlled trials.

There are a number of similar parent training courses that are classified and PMT including Incredible Years (IY), Barkley's Parent Training, and Kazdin PMT.

IY books are available here:

http://www.incredibleyears.com/category/books/

and some are available in Amazon. IY is more of a general parenting training program that covers conduct problems.

Barkley's books are more focused on conduct issues, one for the early years is here:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00E3CC29S/ref=dp-kindle-redirect?_encoding=UTF8&btkr=1

Kazdin PMT is taught in the free online course:

https://www.coursera.org/learn/everyday-parenting

This looks to be the the Patterson Coercive Cycle:

https://www.pendletonpsych.com/doc/parent-child-coercive-cycle.pdf

This free course teaches much more effective methods for changing a kid's behavior:

https://www.coursera.org/learn/everyday-parenting

This:

https://www.cebc4cw.org/topic/parent-training-programs-behavior-problems/

and this:

https://www.cochrane.org/CD008225/BEHAV_group-parenting-programmes-for-improving-behavioural-problems-in-children-aged-3-to-12-years

In other words, rely as much as possible on high quality randomized controlled trials of parenting methods to find an effective parenting method.

Researchers have been evaluating parenting methods using randomized controlled trials for many decades.

Examples of effective parenting methods:

https://www.amazon.com/Incredible-Years-Trouble-Shooting-Children/dp/0578434512/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=incredible+years&qid=1589247519&sr=8-1

https://www.coursera.org/learn/everyday-parenting

OP,

Call the cops and CPS every time he assaults you.

Your parents allow entirely too much violence when you are in their custody. Either you or your brother must live elsewhere starting ASAP.

Show the list below to BOTH parents.

While they read the list or ignore it, call the cops and then CPS to report today's assault. Tell both the cops and CPS that your parents routinely fail to protect you from your brother's assults.

...

...

The child needs to experience some hardships and some "natural consequences." Start making the kid play a team sport EVERY TERM. That will leave less time and energy for tricks and stunts. (Throw in a musical instrument and a foreign language if you can afford lessons.)

Educate yourself about the Kazdin method for handling DEFIANT children. Alan Kazdin wrote the book The Kazdin Method for Parenting the Defiant Child: With No Pills, No Therapy, No Contest of Wills. In addition, read 1-2-3 Magic about disciplining difficult kids age 2-12 years. (See also How to Talk So Little Kids Will Listen by Joanna Faber and Julie King. It works on adults too.) There is also Nigel Latta's Politically Incorrect Parenting: Before Your Kids Drive You Crazy, Read This! Or try Parent Management Training (PMT): https://www.coursera.org/learn/everyday-parenting and see wikipedia.

...

...

Or send the child away to wilderness camp or boarding school or residential treatment.

[I left home at age 15 years, and it was the IDEAL stage for me to begin honoring myself and my own personal preferences outside of my parents' religious fundamentalism.]

Young people become more grounded by hiking and camping away from the distractions of modern life. After weeks outdoors in the wilderness humping a backpack, eating trail mix, and pissing behind bushes, THEY APPRECIATE THE COMFORTS OF HOME. (Recall how much you loved your childhood bedroom after freshman fall term in the dorms?)

NOLS wilderness classes are well respected at 16+ locations worldwide. Consider Outward Bound's "intercept" program (cheap, zero abuse). Wilderness therapy programs AND residential treatment centers for teens are discussed on reddit.com at /r/troubledteens (very expensive, higher probability of abuse). FOR EXAMPLE, True North Wilderness Program in Vermont has been deemed non-abusive by redditors who attended as teens. It is for people ages 14-17 or 18-25. True North is not an academic program. https://truenorthwilderness.com

Elements Wilderness program provides wilderness therapy (hiking with a backpack and counselors for 2-3 months) to male teens AND fe/male young adults over 18 who have psychiatric problems. https://www.elementswilderness.com/

Pure Life Adventure (by Aspiro) takes teens and young adults to Costa Rica for hiking, surfing, meditation, and therapy regarding depression, drug use, etc. https://www.purelifeadventure.com/

Blue Ridge Wilderness Therapy combines hiking and drug rehab.

YMCA summer camps get kids out of the house while next steps are planned.

The National Guard's "Youth Challenge Program" helps boys and girls ages 16-18 years (physical training and GED education; start https://youtu.be/Qk2xx8qH53k ; end https://youtu.be/UyfAm7rkGAA ). More than 120,000 HS students had completed that program by 2015, said CBS News.

Troubled high school dropouts and teen addicts aged 16-18 can earn a GED at Florida Youth Challenge Academy. It is funded by the government. Over 25 other states have similar programs. https://youtu.be/qcR30zesksk

Inspirations teen rehab is in Fort Lauderdale. The group meetings have inspired redditors to stay clean of heroin.

A military school like Culver Academy in the midwest could instill discipline and self-reliance in a teen boy or girl. (It is a rich kid military boarding school in Indiana. No child abuse. It feeds grads into Harvard and Stanford. Students wear a uniform and a military haircut. They learn to shoot a gun and ride a horse and swim strongly and ace the SAT / ACT. Wealthy kids from Israel and Saudi Arabia win all the marksmanship medals, though.) Camden Military Academy and Marine Military Academy are solid, too. Parents of badly-behaved teen boys have been dumping them at all-male military boarding schools like Fork Union since the 1800s. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fork_Union_Military_Academy

An expensive Wellspring boarding school in Bethlehem, CT ("The Arch Bridge School at Wellspring") treats children with behavioral, psychiatric, and emotional health issues. http://wellspring.org

The Grove School in CT claims to do the same, but search reddit for the honest truth from current / recent students about sexual harassment between students there and the quality of the college prep curriculum. http://www.groveschool.org/residential/

Troubled boys age 9-15 are admitted here. http://www.littlekeswickschool.net/

Counselors at the Center for Discovery (CFD) in Stamford, CT addresses mental health problems like anorexia, self harm, suicidal ideation, and depression. It is a residential facility for teens.

The Mendota Juvenile Treatment Center serves teenage male psychopaths in Madison, WI. specialty: conduct disorders

Bayfield outside of Toronto is a Canadian boarding school for kids with behavioral problems. It charges $21k per year. Much individual attention is provided to students by teachers -- even if an upset kid is decompressing in a hallway outside of his classroom.

Redditors discuss cool camps in Canada here. https://www.reddit.com/r/NovaScotia/comments/d0jd8a/teen_adventurewilderness_camps/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share

There are also therapeutic boarding schools in the UK. http://best-boarding-schools.net/therapeutic-boarding-schools

Avoid institutions on this list! http://www.heal-online.org/warn.htm

Avoid Teen Challenge programs. https://livipxp.tumblr.com/post/614582237519822848/from-2016-2017-i-was-in-an-all-girls

Avoid Utah facilities run by Mormons! https://www.reddit.com/r/troubledteens/comments/edhyrm/escaping_polygamy_priscilla_an_escapee_from/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share

Check out these resources. https://www.reddit.com/r/troubledteens/comments/ooomq/whats_a_parent_to_do_resources_for_parents_of/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share

...

...

THERE ARE CHEAP OPTIONS.

Redditor hangingsocks posted this on March 6, 2020.

"Our kid started that shit when she was 15. Stealing cars, drinking, light drug use, sneaking out, sneaking a boy in...We packed her up over summer and sent her to different countries, a really shitty camp she hated, (it was a camp in Spain that she taught English for 14 hours a day and only cost us the flight yp get her there) basically let her be home less than 2 weeks worth of days the while time. Told her if she continued ruining our home, she would be digging toilets in Panama next time. She turned it around."

https://www.diverbo.com/ -- These language camps abroad cost airfare plus $400.

...

...

A shrink should assess the child for bipolar issues, ADHD, oppositional defiant disorder, schizophrenia, etc. Better to get the right cocktail of prescribed medications before drugs and alcohol are used to treat the demons. Rx drugs can be blended into smoothies or dissolved in grape juice if the child refuses to be dosed. Ask the defiant kid's psychiatrist if Risperidone is an appropriate treatment.

The kid may be a sociopath or psychopath who is bound for prison regardless of your efforts. It is only a matter of time until the child can be tried as an adult and can be sent to jail or prison.

Getting a violent or predatory child away from victim siblings is crucial. Do it before CPS removes the violent or predatory offender and puts them in foster care or in juvenile detention.

Send this list of options to his bio parents.

...

...

...

The child needs to experience some hardships and some "natural consequences." Start making the kid play a team sport EVERY TERM. That will leave less time and energy for tricks and stunts. (Throw in a musical instrument and a foreign language if you can afford lessons.) Remove all video games until the child is an 18yo high school graduate.

Educate yourself about the Kazdin method for handling DEFIANT children. Alan Kazdin wrote the book The Kazdin Method for Parenting the Defiant Child: With No Pills, No Therapy, No Contest of Wills. In addition, read 1-2-3 Magic about disciplining difficult kids age 2-12 years. (See also How to Talk So Little Kids Will Listen by Joanna Faber and Julie King. It works on adults too.) There is also Nigel Latta's Politically Incorrect Parenting: Before Your Kids Drive You Crazy, Read This! Or try Parent Management Training (PMT): https://www.coursera.org/learn/everyday-parenting and see wikipedia.

...

...

Or send the child away to wilderness camp or boarding school or residential treatment.

Young people become more grounded by hiking and camping away from the distractions of modern life. After weeks outdoors in the wilderness humping a backpack, eating trail mix, and pissing behind bushes, THEY APPRECIATE THE COMFORTS OF HOME. (Recall how much you loved your childhood bedroom after freshman fall term in the dorms?)

NOLS wilderness classes are well respected at 16+ locations worldwide. Consider Outward Bound's "intercept" program (cheap, zero abuse). Wilderness therapy programs AND residential treatment centers for teens are discussed on reddit.com at /r/troubledteens (very expensive, higher probability of abuse). FOR EXAMPLE, True North Wilderness Program in Vermont has been deemed non-abusive by redditors who attended as teens. It is for people ages 14-17 or 18-25. True North is not an academic program. https://truenorthwilderness.com BEWARE: Winter hikers endure freezing cold temps!
https://www.reddit.com/r/troubledteens/comments/gkdeag/true_north/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share

Elements Wilderness program provides wilderness therapy (hiking with a backpack and counselors for 2-3 months) to male teens AND fe/male young adults over 18 who have psychiatric problems. https://www.elementswilderness.com/

Pure Life Adventure (by Aspiro) takes teens and young adults to Costa Rica for hiking, surfing, meditation, and therapy regarding depression, drug use, etc. https://www.purelifeadventure.com/

Blue Ridge Wilderness Therapy combines hiking and drug rehab.

New Vision Wilderness in NY, Oregon, and Wisconsin offers hiking and therapy for teens. Redditors say that no abuse occurs.

Parents sometimes send drug-addicted, depressed, self-harming, eating-disordered, or suicidal kids to Open Sky Wilderness Therapy first AND THEN to the The Grove School (described below). https://www.reddit.com/r/troubledteens/comments/501i9t/i_went_to_open_sky_wilderness_therapy_and_it/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share

YMCA summer camps get kids out of the house while next steps are planned.

The National Guard's "Youth Challenge Program" helps boys and girls ages 16-18 years (physical training and GED education; start https://youtu.be/Qk2xx8qH53k ; end https://youtu.be/UyfAm7rkGAA ). More than 120,000 HS students had completed that program by 2015, said CBS News.

California offers outpatient ASPIRE programs in multiple cities after school for mentally troubled kids. https://www.elcaminohealth.org/services/mental-health/specialty-programs/aspire

Troubled high school dropouts and teen addicts aged 16-18 can earn a GED at Florida Youth Challenge Academy. It is funded by the government. Over 25 other states have similar programs. https://youtu.be/qcR30zesksk

Inspirations teen rehab is in Fort Lauderdale. The group meetings have inspired redditors to stay clean of heroin.

Redditor AFO050 works at a ranch for troubled teens. There is no abuse. Much therapy is offered DAILY, and there are fun courses like martial arts!

A military school like Culver Academy in the midwest could instill discipline and self-reliance in a teen boy or girl. (It is a rich kid military boarding school in Indiana. No child abuse. It feeds grads into Harvard and Stanford. Students wear a uniform and a military haircut. They learn to shoot a gun and ride a horse and swim strongly and ace the SAT / ACT. Wealthy kids from Israel and Saudi Arabia win all the marksmanship medals, though.) Camden Military Academy and Marine Military Academy are solid, too. Parents of badly-behaved teen boys have been dumping them at all-male military boarding schools like Fork Union since the 1800s. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fork_Union_Military_Academy

An expensive Wellspring boarding school in Bethlehem, CT ("The Arch Bridge School at Wellspring") treats children with behavioral, psychiatric, and emotional health issues. http://wellspring.org

The Grove School in CT claims to do the same, but search reddit for the honest truth from current / recent students about sexual harassment between students there and the quality of the college prep curriculum. http://www.groveschool.org/residential/

Troubled boys age 9-15 are admitted here. http://www.littlekeswickschool.net/

This Boys Town, Nebraska RTC is similar. https://youtu.be/IznZmbmHwyo

Redditors praise the Mountain Valley Treatment Center in New Hampshire. It is residential -- not wilderness. It is a cheaper nonprofit option, unlike most of these programs.

Counselors at the Center for Discovery (CFD) in Stamford, CT addresses mental health problems like anorexia, self harm, suicidal ideation, and depression. It is a residential facility for teens.

The Mendota Juvenile Treatment Center serves teenage male psychopaths in Madison, WI. specialty: conduct disorders

The Menninger clinic is at a legit hospital in Houston. It offers an ATP program for teens 12-17 with psychiatric disorders and/or addiction. They refer the teens to residential treatment facilities for after ATP ends. https://www.menningerclinic.org/treatment/treatment-for-children-adolescents/inpatient-programs/adolescent-treatment-program

Bayfield outside of Toronto is a Canadian boarding school for kids with behavioral problems. It charges $21k per year. Much individual attention is provided to students by teachers -- even if an upset kid is decompressing in a hallway outside of his classroom.

Redditors discuss cool camps in Canada here. https://www.reddit.com/r/NovaScotia/comments/d0jd8a/teen_adventurewilderness_camps/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share

There are also therapeutic boarding schools in the UK. http://best-boarding-schools.net/therapeutic-boarding-schools

Avoid institutions on this list! http://www.heal-online.org/warn.htm

Avoid Teen Challenge programs. https://livipxp.tumblr.com/post/614582237519822848/from-2016-2017-i-was-in-an-all-girls

Avoid Utah facilities run by Mormons! BEWARE of Soltice East and Solstice West and Alpine Academy where suicidal minors and ftm trans kids are barely kept alive. https://www.reddit.com/r/troubledteens/comments/edhyrm/escaping_polygamy_priscilla_an_escapee_from/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share

Check out these resources. https://www.reddit.com/r/troubledteens/comments/ooomq/whats_a_parent_to_do_resources_for_parents_of/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share

...

...

THERE ARE CHEAP OPTIONS.

Redditor hangingsocks posted this on March 6, 2020.

"Our kid started that shit when she was 15. Stealing cars, drinking, light drug use, sneaking out, sneaking a boy in...We packed her up over summer and sent her to different countries, a really shitty camp she hated, (it was a camp in Spain that she taught English for 14 hours a day and only cost us the flight yp get her there) basically let her be home less than 2 weeks worth of days the while time. Told her if she continued ruining our home, she would be digging toilets in Panama next time. She turned it around."

https://www.diverbo.com/ -- These language camps abroad cost airfare plus $400.

Your Weekly /r/freebies Recap

Sunday, May 24 - Saturday, May 30

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| score | comments | title & link | |--|--|--| | 205 | 147 comments | [US Only] T-Mobile Tuesday 5-26-20: Free Impossible Whopper with $1 order at Burger King, 30% off shoes + free shipping at Crocs, $8 off + free shipping at Overstock, 3 months free TIDAL Premium, 10c off per gallon at Shell| | 51 | 23 comments | [US Only] Free Subaru Badge of Ownership| | 183 | 22 comments | Free Seeds| | 104 | 21 comments | [REDEEM IN STORE] free pint of nightfood ice cream| | 202 | 19 comments | [Global] Free 4 week course provided by Yale| | 24 | 18 comments | [US Only] Free Reusable Water Bottle from Waterbottles.com| | 189 | 18 comments | [Global] Free copy of Borderlands: The Handsome Collection on Epic Games Store|

 

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